Thursday, October 13, 2005

why is so?

lately it seems to me that everybody around just won't let me forget elek. people talk about him like he's still here with me in toronto. i miss him so much i dream of him every couple of nights but i know he feels the opposite about me. i have always had the idea of looking for him when i graduate from university and have plenty of time in the summer since i know which school he goes to and who his dad is but that's something i'll deal with 6 years later no point talking about it anymore.

my rebound guy likes me a lot and i have a feeling he'll grab and kiss me on our first date and i'm not sure if i would really like that to happen. maybe the concept of having a rebound bf/gf is just wrong. i never could and still cannot even hold hands with a guy i don't like that much. sometimes i wonder how girls have sex with guys they don't like at all. perhaps when it comes to sex it doesn't matter? i have no idea.

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